Love Worm….!!!

On my way to my 10 days work trip… thinking of life around me… flash backs are coming in front of me… thinking of the last few days or may be weeks that I have had…

What happened to me… suddenly I found myself in Disney land… the land of fairies… replacing Cinderella, snow white, beauty in her role with the beast… :):)

I was kidnapped from my world…. Eloped with him to his special private world… with future hopes and dreams… is he the right person… can he be the one I was waiting for my entire life??? Donno…. May be he is the one and ONLY…

Do I have doubts about that?? Of course yes… am I doubting life and living??? Yes I do…
Am I worried about the future??? Yes I am… Are we going anywhere with our relationship??? Yes we may…

I cannot tell I loved him at first sight… first sight love does not make sense to me and does not exit… but… I do not know what happened… I found myself in his world suddenly… I left my life behind me for him… left my world… my network… my outings… even my family commitment for him…

I went to the end of the world for him… went out of my way for him… he made me forget my pain and my first love that stayed with me for a very long time… I forgot the torture of love and walked towards its passage again… without thinking of what will happen… I just crave for him…

When he is not around… I feel emptiness… when I am not with him.. I feel lost… he turned my life into sweetness and happiness… regardless of what people may say…

I see him as an angel… my heart keeper and the guardian of my love… I see him as a man of all seasons and centuries… I see him as the pyramids… I see him as the knight on his white horse, coming to rescue me from the evil…

He treated me as I always wished… he gave me the attention, the care, the love and the passion that I always wanted…

I admit it… I got the love worm…

And I am happy it happened that way…

Mesmerized….!!!!

Sitting in a comfy armchair, thinking of us… our relation and our old time together… the good and bad memories we had together… thought of the nice words we whispered… and the ugly words we threw on each others face…

Remembering how I used to quiver in front of you… from the love I had for you in my heart… I was simply mesmerized, thanking God of blessing me with you being in my life…
Memories of us were tantalizing my feeling towards you… how filled I was with love and passion towards you… how I used to love you to madness… how alluring it was to have you around me…

Thinking of all that… my love and passion to you is not the same anymore… my feeling towards you changed to neutral… regardless of the circumstances that led to that… you are not there anymore… you are not part of my system… you are only there when needed…

I found my passion somewhere else… my love shifted to another direction… was captivated by another magnet… fulfilling and rewarding… rapt with passion and love towards me…
No more thinking of you as love… just thinking of my state of passionate rhapsody when you were around, and how to get there one more time…
It used to be painful thinking of us back… but believe me… this pain turned positive towards my new heart passion… flourishing with hope and confidence in tomorrow’s nebulous unknown destiny…

Wish you all the best in life… :) :) !!!

Light Soul

I woke up in the morning with a smile on my face… happy and filled with passion to life… felt my light heart reflecting on my home mirrors… showing a light coming out of my eyes… my face muscles are so relaxed… although I did not have enough sleep…

I had one of my very best days… met people and friends… but above all that, and what is most important… is that I met a soul… a pure one… speaking a little but from the heart… when saying anything… you can tell this soul is not bluffing… such a quality is rarely found in this world of benefits and lies…

A light soul… sometimes I find it observing… or watching other souls… and sometimes I see age showing, blended with discrete wisdom and experience…
Other times… I see a child’s soul inside… a happy one that wants to play and get out of its body to be free to fly high…

I can see the pearl hidden inside… the jewel that shines and reflects lines of rays... nurturing the surrounding with natural light… I can feel warmth hiding behind its shyness… I can read between the curves and the lines of the body reflexes…

A beautiful soul… to keep it in the heart always…!!!

Ballerina

Putting her ballet shoes on… tying their straps around her muscled leg in a crossed way… putting on her fluffy slim dress made of thin transparent off-white cloth… preparing herself to go on stage to perform her dance…

A beautiful tall girl in an elegant fit and make-up… she is waiting in the backstage for her turn to go on stage…. Looking at her colleagues from the side drops of the stage… seeing them performing to their best knowledge…

Her heart beats faster and faster while counting the minutes to her entrance… I must be the best… my entrance should impress my viewers… I do not want to miss any move or forget any part… she keeps on thinking of everything and every possibility… she is calling harm and failure with her mind…

Suddenly she denied the idea of failure and started to boost her moral by encouraging herself through performance of others… see I can do better… I learned this move before… I’ve been there done that several times… I am the queen of stage… I won’t miss it… Her heart beats faster and faster as she approaches her entrance… her entrance is in a second… she just turned red… She moved herself in a very nervous move to pull her body onto the stage in front of her audience…

She entered the stage in a holistic grandiose that got audience attention… she managed to attract their vision to her and keep it on her… She started performing on stage… she was moving like a butterfly… a feather in the air… in a very flexible and harmonized strength and synchronization…

She was smiling to audience… like a bird enjoying freedom of flying out its golden cage… a child taking its first steps to the new world… Every move she makes gives her more confidence in the next move and in her capability… she still cannot see the viewers from the stage light but she feels it…

She is about to finish her moves… and do the finale… her finale was as grand and impressive as her entrance… audience stood up and clapped hard for her… thanking her for the time and effort spent to make them enjoy the performance… she did it… she managed to reach the top and be the best… she finally got what she wants... audience attention, hearts and souls with her…

Wishing to be a life Ballerina…!!

Warm Rain

A long drive in the streets of Cairo at night… A warm rainy weather… with less traffic… and more of a winter mode… driving along the bridge and listening to inspiring love songs that reflects my state of mind those days…

Looking through my dripping car window, reflecting the street and cars light and glowing in my eyes… remembering backwards… the good old days memories of the far past… the recent memories and events… the people I met there… the fun we shared…. the talk we had…

Thinking forward… listening to the voice of my head… feeling the beats of my heart…. reasoning my life…. seeing the future like a movie in front of me… that still needs fine tuning.. :):)
My long drive went to an end to meet a friend… a friend who will listen to me… who will give me the tip of the day unconditionally… this is what I need…

It was a relief meeting my friend… talking out loud… discussing things while enjoying our freshly brewed coffee… my friend my savior and my advisor…. my buddy and my mentor…

We talked about memories… old past and recent past… we talked about life… love… passion… agony… fears… feelings… practicality… future and the unknown… the do’s and don’ts… and most of all… the present…

We left our table… heading back to the car… walked in the sinking streets… under the pouring skies.... we were thinking... we enjoyed our talk… we satisfied our friendship for a day… now it is time to go back home…

I took the drive back through the long bridge… but this time… I felt warmth… looking through the dripping car window is giving me hope… is painting a smile on my face… as tomorrow will be a new glowing day…

Wishing you a lovely day everyday :):)

Cracks allover

Thought of sharing this thought with you…. I was always the person who walks the whole nine yards in everything I did…. Putting effort and passion together to have a perfect outcome… It is rewarding somehow when you see the fruit of your effort in front of you… but do people around you really care??? Do they bother to see effectiveness and efficiency… or they are just filling the gaps and completing their papers “as we say in Arabic”

I stayed for a long time trying to make people understand… but found out that they are stubborn enough to stop listening or watching things…. They reminded me of cracks we see in anything… like walls… glass… or floor…

I started seeing people in a different way… I started reading their “cracks”… which are different from a person to another… once you read their cracks… you can understand and value where do their ideas… and perception of life come from… and you will be able to deal with them accordingly…

Cracks are different and they might be in different locations… but at the end of the day… each one holds his/her crack… and tries to hide it with shields or mend it with temporary molds, that will soon be fallen down… but they never heal them, or try to see how to mend them from their roots.

I met people with brain cracks (the most dangerous unhealed kind of crack)… they just see life from a wrong paradigm… that makes them perceive everything as a wrong thing around them… those people “in my point of view” are introverts or at least people who hurt others in every step they walk… they do not see this… but in fact they do…
They are also judgmental… since they see things differently and they want things to go their way… and if not… then curses will be poured on life and people around them… You just need to avoid argumentative talks with them.. or taking their opinion… they will always see the empty part of the glass in everything….

Heart cracks… this is the easiest crack to mend and heal… this is a temporarily crack… that affects the heart… usually through relationships… heart breaks… annoying circumstances (like death or sickness)…
We are blessed to be able to forget… and start all over again…

Defects from social standards and value… beliefs and environmental surrounding… leads to personality cracks…. This is a type where people have double standards in everything… they say something… and they do another thing… they convince you with ideas they will never apply…
This is due to inheriting wrong ideas… it is not easy to mend or heal… but by effort… exposure… and bitter experiences… they can flip all over… to a better shape… still some residues will remain at the bottom of the character…
People like this… need help and support… because they learn by experience… they go through hell and live in it... they are the victims of society in a way…

We all have cracks… we might have a combination of personality, heart and brain cracks… but the percentages are different….
We only need to know where our cracks are located… and try to mend instead of hiding them… to heal their wounds... instead of taking a temp. pain killer… clean them.. instead of staying with living residues….
We are only too weak to admit it… or to show it to others… we want to prove that we are always right and PERFECT… while perfection is not part of our reality…

I am not writing this to judge anyone… I am only stating a fact of life… I am one of the people who have cracks as well… I am just trying to figure them out to be able to fix them… As long as I live… I will keep on fixing them…

Good luck with finding your crack…

Have a nice day !!!!

Blessings in the world

I am blessed... blessed to have you here... in this special day... at this precious moment... blessed because of you....

Blessed with your care, tenderness and kindness... Blessed I have you in my life...

You are like the expensive pure diamond... rare to find and very precious to keep...
Your words to me today made me feel I am a queen... queen of the world in your eyes... talking about how precious I am in the world... and how I have to stay precious to myself and to other people....

Sometimes I see care and love in your eyes... sometimes i hear you shivering from sincere emotions... sometimes you are not brave enough to express what you hide inside you... but I know it all... I know what you are hiding from me.... I know that friendship is most likely to be... but at the end of the day... we cannot deny the truth... or else we are going to loose...
Loose ourselves in the ocean ... or even to the sky... loose our soul and heart... or just wait for an absolution forever... that will save our soul from vanishing within the ocean waves and the sky scales...

You were a wish and a will... that found its way to what it needs... you were a wishful thinking... you are a kind soul and a strong light heart...

You gave life a different meaning and a sweet flavour... that I was craving for... and now after I tasted this flavour... I am addicted to it... I do not think you will be out off my life soon...

You are there for me now... and you will be here for me always... I want you in my life and want to be in yours... lets keep our souls close... till the end of the world...

To my best soul mate ever.... mine forever...

Just Landed Sweetheart

Nice sentence... taken from a nice person.... Just Landed Sweetheart...
Landed from eternal heaven to give eternal living to my mind... my soul... and may be my heart...

My mind keeps on thinking... what made this person land into my life and in front of me specifically in this time... my soul feels this person... and my heart beats in a rhythm... that never existed before...

It is Amazing how such a person made me think of other perspectives of life, and change my way of thinking... or at least alter it to a more positive direction... towards a smoother and lighter spirit that my soul was leveraged to... to musical instruments playing on my heart beats that made me feel the sweetness of life (with its bitter part all together)... with the word "Sweetheart"

Landed like angels from heaven... to spread kindness... forgiveness and love... all over....